Posts Tagged ‘Medical’

4 items.

“You are going to insert a flexible tube… where?”

by Seraphine Khorana on April 22nd, 2011
Posted In: Comics
“You are going to insert a flexible tube… where?”

I have to wonder, though: What sort of person becomes a butt doctor? I’ve met thousands of people in my lifetime and never once has anyone told me their life’s dream is to be a Rear Admiral. I can understand the desire to be a brain surgeon or somebody that can restore eye sight; I can’t imagine wanting to be up in somebody’s business.
The thing that scares me is– if they go far enough into the colon, through the stomach and past the esophagus– they might eventually find my head. Oh oh.

YouTube video of Katie Couric’s colonoscopy.

Dr. Kylie Johnson’s MADtv colonoscopy. “Alright, Robin, to the batcave!”
“Roll up the windows, kids, we’re going to pass a farm!”

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Self-Medication

by Seraphine Khorana on November 2nd, 2010
Posted In: Comics
Self-Medication

I’m going to concentrate only on positive influences. Starting tomorrow. I’m going to burn sage and eat chocolate.

People are just fed up with the Obama administration – that ‘hope and change’ thing, said retail manager Nadine Leder in Milwaukee, Wisconson.
Quotation from Republicans poised for big gains by Andy Smith, Reuters.
(Yes, people are fed up with that “hope” thing. It’s horribly tiring.)

Participants who tested positive for depression consumed an average of 8.4 servings of chocolate per month.
Quotation from Depression and Chocolate: Self-Medication or Perpetuation? by Charles Bankhead
(Only 8.4 servings per month? That surely must be a misprint.)

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If Walls Had Ears

by Seraphine Khorana on October 9th, 2009
Posted In: Comics
If Walls Had Ears

This October is the 25th anniversary of National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. More than 40,000 men and women will die from this disease this year. Early detection can save your life. Although men and women of all ages can get breast cancer, women especially aged 40 and older should get a mammogram and clinical breast exam every year. Please have yourself checked. And if you don’t already know how, it’s important that you learn how to self-examine your breasts.

Susan G. Komen for the Cure is the world’s largest grassroots network of breast cancer survivors and activists.

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What is the Medical Billing Code for “It was caused by a toilet seat?”

by Seraphine Khorana on November 12th, 2008
Posted In: Comics
What is the Medical Billing Code for “It was caused by a toilet seat?”

Medical care is going to get more complicated. A new medical coding system is soon going to be released. Consisting of over 155,000 codes, ICD-10 will be used to define various ailments and treatments provided by doctors, labs and hospitals. The new system will have, for example, 45 different ways to describe a sprained ankle.
Insurance companies love complexity because every little coding error gives them a reason to deny or delay paying medical claims. Initial estimates predict coding errors will rise by as much as 25%.

Why Do We Need 1,170 Codes for Angioplasty? (The Wall Street Journal Online)
Injured By a Spacecraft? There’s a Diagnostic Code for That. (The Wall Street Journal Health Blog)

A woman went to a plastic surgeon and asked him to make her like Bo Derek.
He gave her a labotomy.
Quotation from Joan Rivers

She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but
her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
Quotation from Actual Medical Records (Medi-Smart.com)

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