When a chicken brings you arugula, it is considered an act of love.
I certify no animals were harmed during the making of this comic.
The scarecrow is a trained professional.
My class project is due and finals are on Wednesday.

My salad days, when I was green in judgment…
Quotation from Wm. Shakespeare, Anthony And Cleopatra

Boys, I may not know much, but I know chicken shit from chicken salad.
Quotation from Lyndon B. Johnson, former American President

Out of curiosity, I googled how many days old I am. Then I tried to remember as many of those days as I could. I found eureka moments, childhood memories, people, places, my wedding day, adventures, some Christmases. I remembered important days as well as insignificant days that were somehow important enough to be retained. I regretably confess I cannot remember all 14,368 days.
No, today isn’t my birthday, but I will nonetheless try to make it memorable.

Here is a “How Many Days Young Am I?” calculator. (Derbyshire Guide)

Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. If you’re alive, it isn’t.
Quotation from Richard Bach

“What happened to the chocolate?”
“I ate it. It was there for three days. You had as many opportunities to eat it as I did.”

Symptoms of chocolate toxicity include: hyper-excitability and hyper-irritability; increased heart rate, restlessness and urination; muscle tension and tremors. Complications include hypothermia, seizures, cardiac arrest, even death. Death can result from intoxication… No antidote exists for chocolate poisoning in a dog.
Quotation from VetInfo.com, My Dog Ate Chocolate: How Much is Toxic?

There’s no road map on how to raise a family; it’s always an enormous negotiation.
Quotation from Meryl Streep

I’m not a mother but I still like to nurture and make pancakes.

I remember when I was a kid I used to come home from Sunday School and my mother would get drunk and try and make us pancakes.
George Carlin

3) The unexamined life is not worth living.
2) Be mindful of the questions you ask.
1) All questions ultimately have the same answer.

Let none deceive another,
Or despise any being in any state.
Quotation from Sutta Nipata

The house and the tree in the header photo remind me of an old married couple. When one finally goes, the other will die shortly after.

They were watching Animal Planet, one of their favorite shows, when a nurse’s aide checked on them.
“I’m going to die today,” Lolie told the aide, who asked her if she needed to go back to the hospital.
No, she just felt “different,” Lolie told her.
When the aide came back a short time later, Lolie wasn’t breathing. Moments later, they discovered James had also passed away.
Quotation from Wendy Victora, NWF Daily News “Couple together for 59 years; Die moments apart”

Petting a dog, a camel or an elephant can reduce feelings of loneliness and stress. Assuming of course, you don’t get spat upon, peed on, bitten or squashed.

It’s not that animals have magic vibes coming out of them. It’s about giving people a sense of life beyond what they ordinarily experience.
Quotation from William Banks, Saint Louis University

Elephant Therapy and Equine Therapy Programs are used as tools for gaining self-understanding and emotional growth in adults and children, and are especially effective for children with Asperger’s and Autism.

Friends will arrive and friends will disappear. There are lifetime friendships, to be sure, but like great-grandmother’s diamond ring, nothing lasts forever.

I been meek, and hard like an oak.
I seen pretty people disappear like smoke.
Friends will arrive and friends will disappear,
If you want me, honey baby, I’ll be here.
Lyric from Vic Chesnutt, Buckets of Rain

[Vic Chesnutt, in a wheelchair since an auto accident at age 18, died on Christmas day from an overdose of muscle relaxants]

A wish for world peace from me to you. Merry Christmas.

Christmas is perhaps the only time in the year when people can obey their natural impulses and express their true sentiments without feeling self-conscious.
Quotation from Francis C. Farley

Christmas is not as much about opening our presents as opening our hearts.
Quotation from Janice Maeditere

How do children learn how to make elephant sounds? I can understand a moo-moo here and an oink-oink there, but an elephant? It must be something babies are born with, because every infant I’ve met knows how to **BiaAAH!**

A baby’s cry is appropriately disturbing: ear-piercing enough to get the caregiver’s attention… but not so disturbing as to make the listener want to avoid the sound altogether.
Quotation from Ask Dr. Sears, 7 Things Parents Should Know About Baby’s Cries