Great news. My office isn’t going to be closed! I’ve suspected this for several months, especially after we got new computers in January. I’m going to continue taking classes though, because I don’t ever want to feel occupationally vulnerable again.

You with the sad eyes don’t be discouraged
I realize it’s hard to take courage
In a world full of people, you can lose sight of it all
And the darkness inside you can make you feel so small
But I see your true colors shining through
I see your true colors and that’s why I love you
Lyric from Cyndi Lauper, True Colors

I got my cast taken off last week. Actually, I took it off myself. I was tired of wearing it.

When we are planning for posterity, we ought to remember that virtue is not hereditary.
Quotation from Thomas Paine

The economy is stuck in an unvirtuous cycle.
Quotation from Mark Vitner, Wells Fargo Bank economist

The tragic oil “spill” in the Gulf of Mexico continues. BP CEO Tony Hayward’s congressional hearing this week was a disappointment. I wanted him to tell Congress that BP takes every precaution to prevent accidents like this. I wanted to hear that safety and protecting the environment is as important to him as profits. After all, Mr. Hayward was appointed in 2007 to “clean up” BP after the Texas City refinery fire of 2005 and the Prudhoe Bay pipeline spills that occured the following year. But instead of changing the penny-pinching corporate culture of BP, he cut expenses and eliminated 7,500 jobs.

Does America’s rightous indignation make you feel uncomfortable? It does me. Two months ago, we were angry at Goldman Sachs. BP is just the villain du jour. The underlying problem is we– as a society– tolerate expediency over having to make difficult choices. Too many of us think it’s ok to use torture as a tool in the war against terrorism. Why do Republicans and Democrats point fingers at each other rather than fix the health care system or Social Security? Where is the indignation over having 300,000 homeless children in California?
Doing the right thing proactively is always less costly and painful than damage control after something bad happens.

Far From Gulf, a Spill Scourge 5 Decades Old (The New York Times) “The Niger Delta, where the wealth underground is out of all proportion with the poverty on the surface, has endured the equivalent of the Exxon Valdez spill every year for 50 years.”

Be inspired by: The Excitement is Building (on Habitat for Humanity) “Everyone is pretty ordinary. No divas or superstars. But together we make a very big difference.”

Here’s my plan: I want to be practical. I want to work in the writing/photography/graphics field, but my background is in banking/economics/finance. I need to be completely honest with myself, but I’m torn. Do I make the risky choice or the safe choice? Tell me– What should I do?

Don’t compromise yourself. You are all you’ve got.
Quotation from Janis Joplin

I have been struggling for many years in pursuit of a career in opera and am finding that it’s the people who have money behind them who are getting places, whether or not they have the best voices… So, yes, I’d marry for money at this point. After all, having the career would make me happy.
Quotation from “pvlstar” on iVillage.com

While $1 million or $2 million may sound like a lot to people making $30,000, it’s hardly enough to transform someone’s life or make them “rich” by contemporary billionaire standards.
Quotation from Robert Frank, Marrying for Love of Money

Everyone thinks they know themselves. After all, we live in the back alleys of our minds smelling the same soup every day. But how self-aware are we really? Are we like my Uncle Clem who seems mindless that his house smells like dog urine? Do we get so used to ourselves that we can’t smell what is obvious to everyone else?

While Washington poured billions into propping up the banks and financial institutions that brought our economy to its knees, the Chinese spent their stimulus billions on an epic 19,000 miles of new railroad track. Nearly half of that total will go towards completing a web of more than 42 inter-province hyperspeed rail lines that will link almost every major city in the country. The fastest of the new trains travel at 229 miles per hour. So China comes out of the economic crisis with a rail system that will be the envy of the world.
Quotation from Graydon Carter, Wild on the Street, Vanity Fair

I want to be free. No responsibilities. Sitting in a cafe drinking kir royale while reading a book, observing life and people between the pages until they become real.

Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.
Quotation from Steve Jobs, Commencement address delivered to Stanford University

It’s like being in high school and knowing I’ll graduate in six months. The real world is out there and I’m wondering what I’m going to do. People tell me: “Some day you’ll look back at this and think how wonderful it was.” Ha!

Richard Vernon: What did you want to be when you were young?
Carl: When I was a kid, I wanted to be John Lennon.
Richard Vernon: Carl, don’t be a goof. I’m making a serious point here.
Quotation from the movie The Breakfast Club

Andrew Clark: You don’t have any goals.
John Bender: Oh but I do.
Andrew Clark: Yeah?
John Bender: I wanna be just like you. I figure all I need is a lobotomy and some tights.
Another quotation from the movie The Breakfast Club

I’m trying to be sensible, but going to work after being told I am going to be laid off is weird. They want me to be committed, but how can you commit when you can’t trust your employer any longer? For another thing, I feel rejected, vulnerable and powerless. I’m being dumped. I want to get angry, but I can’t because I’m suddenly walking on thin ice. I want to grieve, but I can’t do that either. I have to go to work tomorrow; I’ll go to work until they tell me not to come in again.

Are you being given impossible jobs with no chance of success? This one is underhanded, which is why it’s so popular. The company may need a big reason to give you the boot, especially if you’ve done everything right and are the life and soul of your department. Enter the impossible task. “Ahh Wilkins, we need you to expand our new line of warm, alcohol-free beers to construction workers.”
Quotation from Paul Michael, You’re Fired! 20 Signs That a Pink Slip is Coming

I am soon joining the ranks of the unemployed. My department will shut down in six to twelve months and my “separation package” is contingent on my staying to the very end.

Imagine standing atop a train going 120 mph, and the train goes through a tunnel but you do not. You hit the wall above the opening at 120 mph. That’s how fast you will be going at the end of your fall. Yes, it’s discouraging, but proper planning requires that you know the facts. You’re used to seeing things fall more slowly. You’re used to a jump from a swing or a jungle gym, or a fall from a three-story building on TV action news. Those folks are not going 120 mph. They will not bounce. You will bounce. Your body will be found some distance away from the dent you make in the soil (or crack in the concrete).
Quotation from David Carkeet, Unplanned Freefall? Some Survival Tips

“Nun’s Farts” are little dessert pastries that look like cinnamon rolls. These wee confections are also called bourriques de soeurs nuns ‘belly buttons’ or more politely rondelles ‘slices’ or hirondelles ‘swallows.’ Inching a little higher up the obscenity scale, one finds a doughnut-like roll made from leftover home-made bread dough called trous de soeur ‘nun’s holes.’ They are usually eaten with molasses—to sweeten the experience.
Quotation from Bill Casselman, Acadian Food Words & New Origin of the Word Acadia

Actually, I did receive a generous donation (Thanks Sara!). Now all I need is an agent, a patron or a corporate sponsor. Or a sugar daddy cookie.

I stood almost motionless on a box in harvard square, painted white, relinquishing my fate and income to the goodwill and honor of the passers-by. I spent years gradually building up a tolerance to the inbuilt shame that society puts on laying your hat/tipjar on the ground and asking the public to support your art…
Quotation from Amanda Palmer, Dresden Dolls