Posts Tagged ‘Birthday’

7 items.

“You are going to insert a flexible tube… where?”

by Seraphine Khorana on April 22nd, 2011
Posted In: Comics
“You are going to insert a flexible tube… where?”

I have to wonder, though: What sort of person becomes a butt doctor? I’ve met thousands of people in my lifetime and never once has anyone told me their life’s dream is to be a Rear Admiral. I can understand the desire to be a brain surgeon or somebody that can restore eye sight; I can’t imagine wanting to be up in somebody’s business.
The thing that scares me is– if they go far enough into the colon, through the stomach and past the esophagus– they might eventually find my head. Oh oh.

YouTube video of Katie Couric’s colonoscopy.

Dr. Kylie Johnson’s MADtv colonoscopy. “Alright, Robin, to the batcave!”
“Roll up the windows, kids, we’re going to pass a farm!”

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Death Cap (Amanita phalloides)

by Seraphine Khorana on March 5th, 2011
Posted In: Comics
Death Cap (Amanita phalloides)

Tonight, I’m at the top of the proverbial mountain. I’ve arrived at the pinnacle.
This is it. Ta-da.
Tomorrow is my birthday, the one that changes everything. It’s the big four-oh.
No, I’m not Sisyphus. There is no huge boulder to roll back downhill, allowing me to start over. My punishment reward is to keep going.
Here’s what I’m blessed with: I’m comfortable in my own skin; I have a strong sense of self; Being 40 is 10 times easier than being 20.
I’ll get through this, even if it kills me.

Only good girls keep diaries. Bad girls don’t have time.
Quotation from Tallulah Bankhead

“I was blackballed by seven Pizza joints.” (Sarah Colonna on Youtube)

A bird doesn’t sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song.
Quotation from Maya Angelou

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26 Comments

Day Old Cake

by Seraphine Khorana on July 8th, 2010
Posted In: Comics
Day Old Cake

Out of curiosity, I googled how many days old I am. Then I tried to remember as many of those days as I could. I found eureka moments, childhood memories, people, places, my wedding day, adventures, some Christmases. I remembered important days as well as insignificant days that were somehow important enough to be retained. I regretably confess I cannot remember all 14,368 days.
No, today isn’t my birthday, but I will nonetheless try to make it memorable.

Here is a “How Many Days Young Am I?” calculator. (Derbyshire Guide)

Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. If you’re alive, it isn’t.
Quotation from Richard Bach

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33 Comments

A Pinch for Good Luck

by Seraphine Khorana on March 6th, 2010
Posted In: Comics
A Pinch for Good Luck

Dear Mr. [******]
Thank you for your letter of March 3, 2010. I appreciate your concern regarding my personal life. No, I do not have financial stress, nor issues with job loss, medical problems, divorce or “other life events” that have impacted my ability to repay my auto loan with your company. I appreciate your generous offer to assist with budgeting, restructuring and/or consolidating my finances. That is very kind of you. But at present, I do not have any of those problems. *Knock on wood*
I think you lost my auto payment that was sent to you on February 25, 2010. You see, I have you on an automatic payment schedule through Billpay, so the payments are sent to you automatically each month. To date, that has never been a problem.
I guess you did not consider that maybe you might have lost my check someplace? Did you look behind your desk? Perchance, you credited my payment to somebody else’s account? Is it still in your in-box awaiting processing?
If you cannot find my check, please let me know and I will send you another one. ASAP.
Sincerely, Sera

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The Black Swan

by Seraphine Khorana on July 29th, 2009
Posted In: Comics
The Black Swan

No matter how carefully you prepare, Black Swan events, by definition, will still occur. Gotcha.

Ten Principles for a Black Swan-Proof World (FooledByRandomness.com) What is fragile should break early while it is still small.

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The cost of hiding is the value of the alternative

by Seraphine Khorana on March 7th, 2009
Posted In: Comics
The cost of hiding is the value of the alternative

apropos of nothing: off the lobby is a sauna
with a crack and my face pressed to it.
the front desk girl is putting drops in the eyes of another guest.
the sauna’s yellow light is burning my shoulder
and i should slip into the courtesy robe, and close my pores.
the bed is already turned down in my room.
but a lady carrying a dog puts down an empty wine glass
and i’m sure her dog is looking at me and licking its nose.
poem i wrote, on my birthday

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“It’s Owner Occupied”

by Seraphine Khorana on March 6th, 2009
Posted In: Comics
“It’s Owner Occupied”

Pooping is a shared human experience, so why do most people prefer “privacy” when they use the toilet? Public bathroom hint #1: Don’t use the toilet located directly in front of the mirrors, because people will be able to see you. Bathroom hint #2: Girls don’t fart.
P.S. Today’s my birthday. In honor of such, please feel free to sit on one cheek.

Video: Girls in the Restroom (YouTube.com)

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