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Archive for ‘Comics’

822 items.

How to Trick the Universe

by Seraphine Khorana on May 17th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

Question: What is bigger than the Universe? Answer: The box it came in. Construct a Hypothesis: Insert tab A into Slot C with crochet hook G, repeat 21 times, then turn the corner. Draw a Conclusion : There is really no right or wrong.

The Pisces girl can swim about in an endless sea of emotions with no shore in sight and, as result, can end up absorbing so much emotional energy from her environment that she can become drained of vitality, causing her to withdraw into herself in the manner of a self-imposed exile of solitude.
Quotation from PiscesWoman.net

└ Tags: Behavior, Creation, Emo, Isolation, Moon, Pisces, Plan B, Seduction, Trick, Universe

21 Comments

Silly Goose

by Seraphine Khorana on May 12th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

Too often, I judge my worth by how others see me. It’s a social thing, not unique to women. I think I could be happier if I was different. I wish I was either [choose one] taller, older, younger, thinner, prettier, more athletic; I want longer hair, shorter hair, shinier hair, highlights, boobs, better complexion, smaller feet, longer fingers. I wish I didn’t wear glasses. I eat well and exercise regularly. I don’t rest enough. Do you like yourself?

No object is so beautiful that, under certain conditions, it will not look ugly.
Quotation from Oscar Wilde

It is better to be beautiful than to be good, but it is better to be good than to be ugly.
Another quotation from Oscar Wilde

Anniversaire heureux, Northie!

└ Tags: Beauty, Boobs, Change, Confidence, Conformity, Diet, Duck, Exercise, Expectations, Happiness, Health, Judgement, Models, Perfection, Self-Esteem, Sleep, Therapy, Truth, Ugly, Women

24 Comments

All is Fair in Love and War

by Seraphine Khorana on May 10th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

“What happened to the chocolate?”
“I ate it. It was there for three days. You had as many opportunities to eat it as I did.”

Symptoms of chocolate toxicity include: hyper-excitability and hyper-irritability; increased heart rate, restlessness and urination; muscle tension and tremors. Complications include hypothermia, seizures, cardiac arrest, even death. Death can result from intoxication… No antidote exists for chocolate poisoning in a dog.
Quotation from VetInfo.com, My Dog Ate Chocolate: How Much is Toxic?

There’s no road map on how to raise a family; it’s always an enormous negotiation.
Quotation from Meryl Streep

└ Tags: Chocolate, Conscience, Cooperation, Couples, Dogs, Fairness, Family, Gluttony, Health, Love, Permission, Temptation, War

18 Comments

Mother’s Day

by Seraphine Khorana on May 8th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

I’m not a mother but I still like to nurture and make pancakes.

I remember when I was a kid I used to come home from Sunday School and my mother would get drunk and try and make us pancakes.
George Carlin

└ Tags: Achievement, Beauty, Children, Drunk, Family, Hugs, Inspiration, Love, Mother, Mother's Day, Pancake, Pregnant, Pride, Relationships, Responsibility, Sex, Women, Worry

33 Comments

Perfect Resume

by Seraphine Khorana on May 4th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

You do not want your resume to say more than you are willing to admit. Such as: My work experience includes being a Night Stalker at WalMart. I am currently on maturity leave.

The universe is not required to be in perfect harmony with human ambition.
Quotation from Carl Sagan

Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
Quotation from George Carlin

└ Tags: Achievement, Ambition, Boobs, Careless, Conformity, Credibility, Error, Goals, Opportunity, Perfection, Professional, Resume, Unemployment, Women, Work

23 Comments

On Being Blonde

by Seraphine Khorana on May 2nd, 2010

Posted In: Comics

April 28th marked the third anniversary of EncoreSeraphine.com. 793 comics. Much love. Thank you. ~Sera

You treated me like a goddess
When we were around everyone else
Now how come you couldn’t notice me
When I was standing by myself
Lyric from Meiko, Sleep

If every angel’s terrible
Then why do you welcome them
You said you’d provide the birdbath
If I’d provide the skin
Lyric from CocoRosie, Terrible Angels “It’s perfectly flawed imho”

└ Tags: Achievement, Anniversary, Average, Blonde, Boredom, Change, Comics, Encore Seraphine, Exploits, Friends, Hallucinations, Hugs, Imperfection, Inspiration, Milestone, Personality, Sickness, Spam, Strange, Time, YouTube

28 Comments

There Are Never Enough Good Excuses

by Seraphine Khorana on April 27th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

We tried to find a good excuse to extend our mini-holiday in Santa Cruz. We could think of a thousand “lame” excuses: We forgot which day it was; We couldn’t drive home because it was a ‘Spare the Air’ day; We had to clean up a potato that exploded in the microwave. But unfortunately, we couldn’t think of a GOOD excuse to stay.

Bad excuses are worse than none.
Quotation from Thomas Fuller

Please excuse Blanche from jim today. She is administrating.
Quotation from 28 Funny Excuses for Missing School (School-Survival.net)

└ Tags: Diplomacy, Driving, Excuses, Getaway, Hiding, Holiday, Imagination, Miracle, Misinformation, Plan B, San Francisco, Schemes, Spring Break, Time, Work

23 Comments

A Powerless World

by Seraphine Khorana on April 24th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

Not everything is fixable. I don’t now which is worse- knowing something can’t be fixed, or knowing it can be fixed and doing nothing about it. Either way, it translates into feelings of uselessness and inadequacy. And why is it so easy to put off important things until tomorrow, when fixing them today would be much less painless.

“Procrastination” Tales Of Mere Existence (YouTube)

Procrastination is, hands down, our favorite form of self-sabotage.
Quotation from Alyce P. Cornyn-Selby

Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task.
Quotation from William James

└ Tags: Behavior, Bills, Business, Economy, Environment, Existence, Free Electrons, Global Warming, Pain, Paradox, Power, Procrastination, Profits, Reality, Regret, Responsibility, Self-Esteem, Service, Sheep, Slave, Time, Tomorrow, Waiting

25 Comments

Promiscuous Women / Divine Retribution

by Seraphine Khorana on April 21st, 2010

Posted In: Comics

If I can’t blame YOU, who else is there to blame?

Father Wages Court Battle Against Funeral Protests “Military deaths are the work of a wrathful God who punishes the United States for tolerating homosexuality.” (ABC News)

Why Is Pat Robertson Blaming Haiti? “The [Haitian earthquake] was divine retribution for a pact with the devil.” (Time Magazine)

Disabled Kids are God’s Punishment for Abortion “God is taking “vengeance” on parents who have had abortions by making their other children disabled.” (CBS News)

└ Tags: Behavior, Blame, Credibility, Devil, Disaster, Earthquake, Fairness, Forgiveness, Gay, God, Guilt, Humiliation, Injury, Iran, Judgement, Military, Misbehavior, Naughty List, Predict, Punishment, Purity, Repression, Responsibility, Revenge, Satan, Sex, Temptation, Tolerance, Women

23 Comments

Ugly Hair Day

by Seraphine Khorana on April 19th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

When you have an ugly hair day, conventional wisdom says to put your hair into a ponytail or wear a hair accessory. The other option is to wear an invisibility cloak.

Scientists at UC Berkeley have taken a major step toward making Harry Potter’s disguise of choice a reality. They’ve engineered two new materials — one using a fishnet of metal layers, the other using tiny silver wires — that neither absorb nor reflect light, causing it instead to bend backward.
Quotation from Time Magazine

I’m fine but you’re obviously having a bad hair day.
Quotation from Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992 movie)

└ Tags: Ambition, Beauty, Behavior, Blindfolded, Chameleon, Confidence, Crisis, Hair, Harry Potter, Invisible, Mirror, Monday, Perfection, Pressure, Self-Esteem, Ugly, Wisdom, Women, Zombies

29 Comments

Subprime Cookies

by Seraphine Khorana on April 16th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

“What’s in the cookie batter?” she wanted to know. “Lots of sugar,” he said. “Just remember I’m not responsible if you don’t like them.”

Goldman Sachs charged with fraud by SEC “These charges are far more severe than anyone had imagined,” and suggest Goldman teamed with “the leading short-seller in the industry to design a portfolio of securities that would crash,” said John Coffee, a securities law professor at Columbia Law School in New York. (Reuters)

Abacus Allowed Goldman to Shuffle Mortgage Risk Like Beads “The SEC said that Goldman Sachs created and sold Abacus 2007-AC1 without disclosing that hedge fund Paulson & Co. helped pick the underlying securities and also bet the CDO would default. Paulson was proved correct, and his hedge fund eventually turned a $1 billion profit and CDO investors lost a similar amount, according to the SEC.” (Bloomberg)

The product was new and complex but the deception and conflicts are old and simple. Goldman wrongly permitted a client that was betting against the mortgage market to heavily influence which mortgage securities to include in an investment portfolio, while telling other investors that the securities were selected by an independent, objective third party.
Quotation from SEC Enforcement Director Robert Khuzami

└ Tags: Agreement, Ambition, Bankrupt, Banks, Contracts, Cookie, Corruption, Crime, Disclosure, Dysfunction, Economy, Financial Stability Plan, Fraud, Goldman Sachs, Great Depression, Hedge Funds, Investments, Manipulation, Misbehavior, Money, Mortgage, Profits, Relationships, Reputation, Responsibility, Risk, Security, Shareholders, Toxic Assets, Trading, Unemployment, Wall Street

27 Comments

Mea Culpa

by Seraphine Khorana on April 15th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

What did you wish for? I can’t tell you, because then it won’t come true.
Wishes are the opposite of worries.
I hate asking myself “What’s the worse that can happen?” because I already know.
If I think about them, they might come true. And I’d have nobody to blame but myself.
Mea culpa.

Worry is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind. If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.
Quotation from Arthur Somers Roche

Don’t be afraid of missing opportunities. Behind every failure is an opportunity somebody wishes they had missed.
Quotation from Lily Tomlin

└ Tags: Advice, Behavior, Big Brother, Blame, Careless, Control, Expectations, Fault, Fear, Mea Culpa, Mind, Programming, Thought, Warning, Wishes, Worry

28 Comments

The Precise Behavior of Exceptions

by Seraphine Khorana on April 12th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

Did life turn out the way you thought it would be when you were a kid? What you expected is probably what you got (unless you were unlucky); and if you didn’t expect much, that is also probably what you got. But no matter how well you planned (or didn’t plan), be honest– your life didn’t turn out exactly like you thought it would happen. For better or worse, one thing is certain: There were surprises and exceptions along the way.

Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting a bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian.
Quotation from Dennis Wholey

We are always paid for our suspicion by finding what we suspect.
Quotation from Henry David Thoreau

└ Tags: Achievement, Career, Children, Default, Disappointment, Dreams, Expectations, Exploits, Family, Freedom, Friends, Happiness, Health, Life, Luck, Marriage, Opportunity, Plan B, Reality, Regret, Survival, Tomorrow, Wrinkles

47 Comments

In Deep Yogurt

by Seraphine Khorana on April 10th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

Why do some food companies put gelatin in yogurt? To add firmness and consistency. The gross part is (if you are lacto-ovo vegetarian like I am) gelatin is made from the skin, boiled bones, internal organs and intestines of animals like cows, pigs and horses. It’s a by-product of the meat and leather industries. Gelatin is also commonly found in marshmallows, gummy bears, margarine and even beer. Check your food labels!
P.S. Yogurt has a 10-21 day shelf life according to the National Center for Home Food Preservation.

No, the serpent did not
Seduce Eve to the apple.
All that’s simply
Corruption of the facts.
Adam ate the apple.
Eve ate Adam.
The serpent ate Eve.
This is the dark intestine.
The serpent, meanwhile,
Sleeps his meal off in Paradise
Smiling to hear
God’s querulous calling.
Poem by Ted Hughes, Theology

└ Tags: Anorexia, Discomfort, e.coli, Expire, Food, Health, Horses, Hysteria, Nude, Pigs, Safety, Sickness, Tendon, Vegetarian, Vomit, Warning

32 Comments

Virgin Mary

by Seraphine Khorana on April 7th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

I think the bartender was flirting.

I am not a sexy woman. I’m not beautiful. I’m not a sex kitten. I don’t flirt with people, yet I’ve been tagged more of a sex symbol than women who truly are– and I that’s solely because I don’t reveal too much. People are curious.
Quotation from Shirley Manson

I like my women like I like my coffee… covered in bees!
Quotation from Eddie Izzard

└ Tags: Alcohol, Attraction, Beauty, Coffee, Flirt, Innuendo, Madonna, Misbehavior, Naughty, Nude, Pride, Privacy, Sex, Skittles, Spring Break, Virtue

38 Comments

In Your Face

by Seraphine Khorana on April 5th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

1) One would expect that 50% of all deaths are women. However, according to the CIA World Factbook, there are 107 men born for every 100 women. Since women live longer, the actual worldwide ratio of men to women is 1.01 to 1. Ergo, more men than women die. 2) A woman dies every minute from pregnancy complications and childbirth, mostly in poor countries. 3) Women never cry over nothing.

You did me
a favor
pushing me
out the window
I learned
how to
fly
Poem by Austin Straus

└ Tags: Behavior, Birth Control, Credibility, Cry, Death, Etiquette, Gay, Grief, Health, Marriage, Nude, Poor, Power, Pregnant, Pride, Relationships, Respect, Rights, Safety, Sex, Women

31 Comments

Abandon Ship!

by Seraphine Khorana on April 1st, 2010

Posted In: Comics

Here’s my plan: I want to be practical. I want to work in the writing/photography/graphics field, but my background is in banking/economics/finance. I need to be completely honest with myself, but I’m torn. Do I make the risky choice or the safe choice? Tell me– What should I do?

Don’t compromise yourself. You are all you’ve got.
Quotation from Janis Joplin

I have been struggling for many years in pursuit of a career in opera and am finding that it’s the people who have money behind them who are getting places, whether or not they have the best voices… So, yes, I’d marry for money at this point. After all, having the career would make me happy.
Quotation from “pvlstar” on iVillage.com

While $1 million or $2 million may sound like a lot to people making $30,000, it’s hardly enough to transform someone’s life or make them “rich” by contemporary billionaire standards.
Quotation from Robert Frank, Marrying for Love of Money

└ Tags: Achievement, Banks, Career, Choices, Comics, Compromise, Confidence, Conformity, Economy, Financial Stability Plan, Inspiration, Jobs, Money, Nude, Plan B, Pride, Reality, Responsibility, Self-Esteem, Starting Over, Unemployment, Vulnerable, Women, Work, Worry

53 Comments

Sticky Pants

by Seraphine Khorana on March 27th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

I’ve been flying by the seat of my pants. It has been a month since I’ve been told my department will be shutting down in six to twelve months, so time is precious. I’ve decided to take the Series 66 Registered Investment Advisor examination. I don’t know if that’s really what I want to do, but it gives me another option to pursue careerwise. And that means my updates to Encore Seraphine (and my time online) will be less frequent for a few weeks to a month.
Yes, I’m doing this on purpose. I love you all, and thank you for understanding.

Happy were she could finish forth her fate
In some unhaunted desert, where, obscure
From all society, from love and hate
Of worldly folk; then might she sleep secure.
Poem from Robert Devereux, A Passion of my Lord of Essex

└ Tags: Achievement, Behavior, Brain, Career, Choices, Confidence, Economy, Encore Seraphine, Financial Stability Plan, Flying, Future, Inspiration, Journey, Milestone, Plan B, Pressure, Procrastination, Responsibility, Schemes, Spring Break, Time, Unemployment, Women, Work, Worry

45 Comments

Top of the Food Chain

by Seraphine Khorana on March 24th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

If you think fats and oils are at the top of the food chain, you deserve at least partial credit for a correct answer. But bacteria breaks down oil in this rock-paper-scissors game we call Life.

For the first half of geological time, our ancestors were bacteria. Most creatures still are bacteria, and each one of our trillions of cells is a colony of bacteria.
Quotation from Richard Dawkins

Salad bars are like a restaurant’s lungs. They soak up the impurities and bacteria in the environment, leaving you with much cleaner air to enjoy.
Quotation from Doug Coupland

If you don’t change, then what’s the point of anything happening to you?
Another quotation from Doug Coupland

└ Tags: Bacteria, Balance, Behavior, Cooperation, Credibility, Evolution, Existence, Fear, Feedback, Food, Fool, Life, Mushrooms, Power, Raccoon, Reality, Relationships, Understanding, Worms

31 Comments

Mot du jour: Contiguous

by Seraphine Khorana on March 22nd, 2010

Posted In: Comics

Word of the Day: Contiguous. It means to have contact with, or to be adjacent. It is the opposite of being fragmented or scattered.
When all of your thoughts are touching, it is called Logic. The problem is thoughts jump all over; we don’t have contiguous thoughts. Therefore, we mentally reorder our thoughts until they begin to make sense. In this manner, we build a reasonable case for ourselves based on a kind of false logic. Tragically, the result is we don’t know how stupid, or average, we really are. We can only guess.
In a moment of clarity, everything (and nothing) is readily apparent.

The cathedral towers and the full gables of the quaint old houses were just beginning to blush in the sunrise. There had been no rest for her that night. She was still in her pretty ball-dress, her fair hair hanging somewhat out of curl on her neck, and the circles round her eyes dark with watching. “What a fright I seem,” she said, examining herself in the glass, “and how pale this pink makes one look!” So she divested herself of this pink raiment; in doing which a note fell out from her corsage, which she picked up with a smile, and locked into her dressing-box. And then she put her bouquet of the ball into a glass of water, and went to bed, and slept very comfortably.
Quotation from William Makepeace Thackeray, Vanity Fair

└ Tags: Average, Behavior, Brain, Conformity, Imperfection, Insanity, Inspiration, Intelligence, Logic, Memory, Misinformation, Opinion, Psychology, Reality, Reason, Self-Esteem, Stupid, Theory, Thought, Truth, Understanding, Words

31 Comments

Know Thyself

by Seraphine Khorana on March 20th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

Everyone thinks they know themselves. After all, we live in the back alleys of our minds smelling the same soup every day. But how self-aware are we really? Are we like my Uncle Clem who seems mindless that his house smells like dog urine? Do we get so used to ourselves that we can’t smell what is obvious to everyone else?

While Washington poured billions into propping up the banks and financial institutions that brought our economy to its knees, the Chinese spent their stimulus billions on an epic 19,000 miles of new railroad track. Nearly half of that total will go towards completing a web of more than 42 inter-province hyperspeed rail lines that will link almost every major city in the country. The fastest of the new trains travel at 229 miles per hour. So China comes out of the economic crisis with a rail system that will be the envy of the world.
Quotation from Graydon Carter, Wild on the Street, Vanity Fair

└ Tags: Achievement, America, Behavior, Blindfolded, China, Compliments, Economy, Financial Stability Plan, Genius, Honesty, Inspiration, Intelligence, Jobs, Knowledge, Mind, Politics, Reality, Self, Stimulation, Talent, Train, Zombies

30 Comments

Raise the Stakes

by Seraphine Khorana on March 18th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

I hear people say we should raise the stakes in Afghanistan. Or we need to raise the stakes in the War on Drugs. But you rarely hear talk of raising the stakes in the war on poverty. Why is that? If we are going to “raise the stakes,” we should do so for jobs, women’s rights, the environment, health care, financial reform and schools.

Drug cartels exploit illegal immigrants by forcing them into economic bondage or prostitution. “Drugs are only sold once,” Rep. Loretta Sanchez, the chairwoman of the House Homeland Security border subcommittee, said in an interview. “But people can be sold over and over. And they use these people over and over until they are too broken to be used anymore.”
Quotation from Josh Meyer, Drug cartels raise the stakes on human smuggling
(The Los Angeles Times)

└ Tags: Children, Drugs, Education, Environment, Financial, Freedom, Global Warming, Health, Immigration, Investments, Mother Teresa, Opportunity, Polar Bears, Poverty, Priorities, Reform, Refuge, Rights, Safety, Toilet, Unemployment, War, Women

24 Comments

The Courtship Ceremony

by Seraphine Khorana on March 16th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

Face it: Wooing is out, Woo Woo is in. Courtship in America ended somewhere between the time the television shows The Brady Bunch and The Love Boat were cancelled.

One good idea would be to invite the Pisces lady to your home to show her your aquarium. You should start your seduction process when she is engrossed in seeing fishes in your aquarium. Give her a kiss on the shoulders and this will automatically lead her to your bedroom.
Quotation from “Seduction by Sun Signs” (TheSecretsofSeduction.com)

A tall well-built woman with good
reputation, who can cook frogs
legs, who appreciates a good fuc-
schia garden, classical music and tal-
king without getting too serious.
But please only read lines 1, 3 and 5.
Quotation from a Personal Ad (DateHookup.com)

└ Tags: Attraction, Birds, Compatibility, Dating, Duck, Fool, Girlfriend, Jaws, Lovers, Misbehavior, Personals, Pheromones, Pigs, Pisces, Pornography, Predator, Romance, Seduction, Sex, Temptation, Viagra, Virtue

34 Comments

Sun Tzu

by Seraphine Khorana on March 14th, 2010

Posted In: Comics

I want to be free. No responsibilities. Sitting in a cafe drinking kir royale while reading a book, observing life and people between the pages until they become real.

Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.
Quotation from Steve Jobs, Commencement address delivered to Stanford University

└ Tags: Achievement, Ambition, Books, Confidence, Death, Dreams, Financial Stability Plan, Freedom, Inspiration, Jobs, Life, Naked, Opportunity, Plan B, Reality, Unemployment, War, Wine, Worry

36 Comments

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EncoreSeraphine.com

Archive for ‘Comics’

How to Trick the Universe

Silly Goose

All is Fair in Love and War

Mother’s Day

Perfect Resume

On Being Blonde

There Are Never Enough Good Excuses

A Powerless World

Promiscuous Women / Divine Retribution

Ugly Hair Day

Mea Culpa

The Precise Behavior of Exceptions

In Deep Yogurt

Virgin Mary

In Your Face

Abandon Ship!

Sticky Pants

Top of the Food Chain

Mot du jour: Contiguous

Know Thyself

Raise the Stakes

The Courtship Ceremony

Sun Tzu

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